Up to a few minutes ago, I was having a bit of a morning. Two different people on two different streets cut me off when I was the only other driver on the road, and my drive to work is only about 15 minutes. My car is small and silver, but it does have mass, and it does not have a cloaking mechanism, so if you hit me, it will have physical results, and I mean that in the physics sense of the word! Newtonian physics! Look 'em up, and stay the shit in your lane!
Fortunately, after being at work for a bit and having some tea and laughing with coworkers about yellow squash that looked eerily like trucker balls, I started feeling better, and I am grateful. I really didn't want to be in a mood because of one or two little things. A trick that my therapist has been suggesting for helping me alter my brain chemistry is to do a few semi-smiles. Apparently, you can trick you brain into believing it's happy if you use the muscles in your face to go though the actions of what you would be doing if you were happy already. The good thing it doesn't have to be a big, gigantic, fake-as-shit SMILE! It can be a little cutesy grin, going up to the muscles around the eyes. That triggers chemical releases, and after doing a few of these, like doing sit-ups for your face, you'll feel better. I think I'm going to try this a lot today and see if it changes things.
Today was also my first payday, and even though there was an error with how many hours got submitted, most of my paycheck is accurate, and that means I can get some grocery shopping done tomorrow and start to restore my Paleo pantry. My agent at the temp agency is awesome, and is already working on getting the rest of my hours submitted. So I can officially go into money-saving-mode and work towards having enough money to move in the next year or two. The moment I start thinking about this move, though, my anxiety kicks into high gear, and I have to remind myself to take things one step at a time. What do I need to do right now? I need to catch up on bills and save some money. That's what I need to focus on, and not on the overwhelming possibilities of The Future. I do not have to do everything all at once for me to be successful, and trying to get all of my plans fulfilled immediately is what causes problems. And, more importantly, one bag of super yummy smoked salmon is not going to completely derail my plans! (And, most importantly, as of today, I'm going to start submitting my time cards online, so that error likely won't happen again! Self-five for fixing a mistake! *self-five Barney Stinson style*)
I am sooooo sleeping in tomorrow. Maybe a glass of wine before bed tonight, too. Who knows, I might go crazy and watch "Waiting For Guffman" and snuggle with my puppy. Do I know how to live it up on a Friday night or what! As for the rest of tomorrow, if the remainder of my paycheck is restored, I might get a long-overdue haircut. I'm starting to look like Chewbacca, but since I don't have access to the Millennium Falcon and I don't have the shiny cross-torso belt, I should pay for a little grooming. I do not cut my own hair because I am not an uber-pretentious art student or an East German in the 80s, so I do not need to look like I am either of those things.
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